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The Collapse of Parenting: How We Hurt Our…
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The Collapse of Parenting: How We Hurt Our Kids When We Treat Them Like… (utgåvan 2015)

av Leonard Sax (Författare)

MedlemmarRecensionerPopularitetGenomsnittligt betygOmnämnanden
1131189,547 (3.55)1
In The Collapse of Parenting, Leonard Sax, an acclaimed expert on parenting and childhood development, identifies a key problem plaguing American children, especially relative to other countries: the dramatic decline in young people's achievement and psychological health. The root of this problem, Sax contends, lies in the transfer of authority from parents to their children, a shift that has been occurring over the last fifty years and is now impossible to ignore. Sax pinpoints the effects of this shift, arguing that the rising levels of obesity, depression, and anxiety among young people-as well as their parents' widespread dependence on psychiatric medications to fix such problems-can all be traced back to a corresponding decline in adult authority. Sax argues that a general decline in respect for elders has had particularly severe consequences for the relationship between parents and their children. The result is parents are afraid of seeming too dictatorial and end up abdicating their authority entirely rather than taking a stand with their own children. If kids refuse to eat anything green and demand pizza instead, parents give in, inadvertently raising children who expect to eat sweets and junk food and are thus more likely to become obese. If children demand and receive the latest smartphones, tablets, and other gadgets, and are then allowed to spend the bulk of their waking hours texting with friends and accessing any website they want, they become increasingly reliant on peers and the media for guidance on how to live, rather than their parents. And if they won't sit still in class or listen to adults-parents or teachers-they're often prescribed medication, a quick fix that doesn't help them learn self-control. In short, according to Sax, parents have failed to teach their children good habits, leaving children with no clear sense of the distinction between right and wrong. But Sax insists there is hope. To start with, parents need to regain a central place in the lives of their young children, displacing same-age peers who can't provide the same kind of guidance and stability. Parents also need to learn that they can't be a best friend and a parent at the same time. They'll make their children's lives easier if they focus not on pleasing their kids, but instead on giving them the tools they need to lead happy, healthy lives. Drawing on over twenty-five years of experience as a family psychologist and hundreds of interviews with children, parents, and teachers in the United States and throughout the world, Sax makes a convincing case that if we are to help our children avoid the pitfalls of an increasingly complicated world, we must reassert authority as parents.… (mer)
Medlem:pattienabbie
Titel:The Collapse of Parenting: How We Hurt Our Kids When We Treat Them Like Grown-Ups
Författare:Leonard Sax (Författare)
Info:Basic Books (2015), 304 pages
Samlingar:Ditt bibliotek
Betyg:***1/2
Taggar:1/16

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The Collapse of Parenting: How We Hurt Our Kids When We Treat Them Like Grown-Ups av Leonard Sax

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The Collapse of Parenting is spot-on with the descriptions and theories as to why children today tend to be disrespectful. The attitude towards parents is "ingratitude seasoned with contempt". We live in a culture where disrespect is the norm and attitude is "Live For Now". Why? The author, Leonard Sax, states that parents have "role confusion" and kids now value peers' opinions more than their parents. Another reason is sleep deprivation and fragility. Parents need to teach Fulghum's Rules, along with self-control, skill of disagreeing respectfully, and willingness to fail. Learn from failure then get up and move on. Parental authority is not discipline. It is teaching the child how to behave both in and outside the family unit...teaching right & wrong. "Just Right" parenting style communicates live but also enforces rules fairly and consistently. Suggestions in first half of book include limiting social media and always eat dinner together (and turn off all devices during dinner).

The last part of the book discusses 3 things to do help our kids:
1. Teach Humility. Be as interested in others as you are in yourself. Leads to gratitude, appreciation, and contentment. Kids need to do CHORES and understand the value of labor. The opposite of humility is inflated self-esteem which leads to resentment.
2. ENJOY your time with your child. Do fun things together and don't multitask.
3. Help child figure out the Meaning Of Life. Who am I? What do I really want? What would make me happy? Empower child to take risks, try new things, and then congratulate them for both successes and failures.
The Purpose of Life:
-Meaningful Work
-A Person to Love
-A Cause to Embrace

My job as a parent is to help my child find his potential. "Happiness comes from fulfillment, from living up to your potential..." This book is written in an easy to read style with lots of real life experiences that make the concepts relatable. ( )
  standhenry | Jul 6, 2016 |
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In The Collapse of Parenting, Leonard Sax, an acclaimed expert on parenting and childhood development, identifies a key problem plaguing American children, especially relative to other countries: the dramatic decline in young people's achievement and psychological health. The root of this problem, Sax contends, lies in the transfer of authority from parents to their children, a shift that has been occurring over the last fifty years and is now impossible to ignore. Sax pinpoints the effects of this shift, arguing that the rising levels of obesity, depression, and anxiety among young people-as well as their parents' widespread dependence on psychiatric medications to fix such problems-can all be traced back to a corresponding decline in adult authority. Sax argues that a general decline in respect for elders has had particularly severe consequences for the relationship between parents and their children. The result is parents are afraid of seeming too dictatorial and end up abdicating their authority entirely rather than taking a stand with their own children. If kids refuse to eat anything green and demand pizza instead, parents give in, inadvertently raising children who expect to eat sweets and junk food and are thus more likely to become obese. If children demand and receive the latest smartphones, tablets, and other gadgets, and are then allowed to spend the bulk of their waking hours texting with friends and accessing any website they want, they become increasingly reliant on peers and the media for guidance on how to live, rather than their parents. And if they won't sit still in class or listen to adults-parents or teachers-they're often prescribed medication, a quick fix that doesn't help them learn self-control. In short, according to Sax, parents have failed to teach their children good habits, leaving children with no clear sense of the distinction between right and wrong. But Sax insists there is hope. To start with, parents need to regain a central place in the lives of their young children, displacing same-age peers who can't provide the same kind of guidance and stability. Parents also need to learn that they can't be a best friend and a parent at the same time. They'll make their children's lives easier if they focus not on pleasing their kids, but instead on giving them the tools they need to lead happy, healthy lives. Drawing on over twenty-five years of experience as a family psychologist and hundreds of interviews with children, parents, and teachers in the United States and throughout the world, Sax makes a convincing case that if we are to help our children avoid the pitfalls of an increasingly complicated world, we must reassert authority as parents.

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