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You'll Miss Me When I'm Gone

av Rachel Lynn Solomon

MedlemmarRecensionerPopularitetGenomsnittligt betygDiskussioner
1056203,595 (3.95)Ingen/inga
Eighteen-year-old twins Adina, a viola prodigy, and Tovah, a future surgeon, find their relationship tested when they learn that one of them will develop Huntington's, the degenerative disease ravaging their mother.

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This is one I picked up from the new school library to read over the holidays, solely because the main characters plays viola and I'm just a little obsessed with that instrument, myself.

And I really loved how much musical prodigy Adina loves her instrument.

But not a lot else.

The novel begins "I used to think his touches meant nothing... then his touches started to linger… Today I will make it happen on purpose."
So it seems this is a romance novel - but we quickly discover that Adina and her twin sister Tovah (an academic overachiever) are awaiting the results of a genetic test; they are slowly losing their mother to Huntington's disease and have 50% chance of inheriting the disease.

So the novel spins around the twins' various reactions to their family situation and the results of their tests. Along the way we uncover back story of the conflict that divides the twins and the way this has impacted on the school careers and their friendships. That was the more interesting part of the story, especially when euthanasia was considered by a family member

As far as the romance is concerned, I found this to be a very disappointing account of a teacher-student relationship, with very little consequence for either of the characters. Of more interest were the references to the characters' Jewishness and the way this interacted with their diagnoses, but again, I found the handling fairly stereotypical and occasionally banal - it felt like an add-on.

Adina is not a likable character, but she does hold your attention, which is probably what kept me reading. The writing it self is mediocre: "The couch groans softly at his weight, and my skin sparks with electricity at his nearness. Many measures pass before he speaks again." - the description is relatively banal, but then there's a lovely representation of how Adina thinks everything in her life through music - time is counted in musical measures (bars, for non-American).

Torvah, on the other hand is an honours student who ticks all the boxes for a standard-sized honour studnnet (track, leadership etc.). I would have found most of her chapters less interesting than Adina's, except that she has a very contrasting way of dealing with her mother's illness (and her own potential illness). The dichotomy kept it interesting, even when I was less than engaged with the inter-twin conflict (which seemed to be resolved very hurriedly).

Overall, this is not a book I would highly recommend, even to teenaged girls who are into books about grief and illness - I think there are better novels around. However, if anyone is dealing with Huntington's in their own family or friendship circle - go for it. This is a theme rarely touched on in YA literature and it does give strong insights into the lack of understanding of this illness and the varying effects and onset of the disease.

Trigger warnings for inappropriate sexual relationships and suicide/euthanasia. ( )
  IsabellaLucia | Apr 28, 2021 |
I am not a huge fan of Morgan Matson, but so many people have this book in their top reads of last year. I actually tried picking this up several times, and I could not get past the first chapter. I was finally in the mood to give it another try.

Based on Andie’s family, it was not realistic to think she would become a dog walker. Her father (regardless if there was a scandal going on or not) would have used his connections to help her get into the camp or find her a summer job. I started to make a little more sense when you find out she never even told her dad what happened right away.

I was surprised when Andie and Clark did not have a great first date. It was refreshing! Everything you read always has insta-love, so I liked that the romance was not perfect right away.

I did not like how Andie treated her father in the beginning. I did enjoy seeing them come together and begin healing from the loss of Andie’s mother. There were some emotional moments which hit me a little harder since I lost my father at a young age.

Overall, I was surprised with this. I enjoyed it much more than I thought I would. ( )
  SimplyKelina | Sep 20, 2018 |
Adina and Tovah Seigel are fraternal twins about to turn eighteen years old. Eighteen is supposed to be a lucky number in Hebrew, but to the twins the number eighteen is anything but lucky. In fact, it is quite the opposite. Turning eighteen means they can now take the genetic test to find out if either one of them inherited their mother’s gene for Huntington’s Disease. When one sister’s test comes back positive and the other sister negative, it impacts their lives in different ways.

Adina and Tovah do not have the best of relationships. At one time they were very close, but they had a falling out. Now, with the test results they both try to put the past behind them and start anew. They both have a lot of issues they need to work through and their relationship is shaky at best. Like all sibling relationships, there will always be arguments and times where you will not get along. You can see that with Adina and Tovah. I can see that with my own sisters. We fight and make up and fight and make up again. Adina and Tovah’s relationship is realistically portrayed. Are they both likeable? Yes and no. They were both flawed and complex characters. They both have moments where you either love or hate what they are doing.

Outside influences also made me see the sisters in a different light. Adina is in love with her viola tutor who is a few years older than her whereas, Tovah likes a boy from her school. The boy/girl relationship dynamic between the two sisters was so different. Adina is the siren and she uses her looks to get what she wants. Although realistic, it really made me feel sorry for Adina that she had to use her looks and sexuality to get the guy that she wants. Tovah, on the other hand, is inexperienced and never had a boyfriend. She is uncomfortable in her own skin and dresses the part to hide her body. In this instance, I felt I could relate more with Tovah as she seemed the more down to earth sister. Both relationships were so different and one of them even toxic.

Since the genetic test results have come in both sisters have to come to terms for what this means and how it is going to impact both of their lives. The both see what their mother is going through and as a whole how it is impacting their family. Huntington’s Disease is a genetic disease that affects the brain’s neurons. Symptoms usually occur in your forties and fifties, but can occur even earlier. Imagine living with this fear of not knowing when your own body and mind will betray you….of not being able to function…of dropping things, having mood swings, stumbling and eventually not even being able to take care of yourself. I can only imagine what that would feel like to know in ten or twenty years or maybe even sooner my life is going to change and not for the better. You can see the turmoil both Adina and Tovah experience because of these results. How guilty one must feel to know their sibling was not spared. How their life is going to continue while their sibling worries about every time they drop a plate or stumble and if it a sign of early symptoms progressing.

There is one aspect that I really loved that the author, Rachel Lynn Solomon, took a huge risk on and that is thoughts of suicide. Honestly, it was beautifully done and so real. I am so glad the thought of suicide was not left out because it is an emotion some people think about especially when they are sick or know they are going to die. It is a really hot topic and not everyone will agree with the right to die. Personally, I would never want to be a burden to my family and if I had a disease like Huntington’s at some point I would hope my state had the option for assisted suicide. I think you should be able to live your life the way you want to and be able to die on your own terms. Again, this is just my opinion. I accept that not everyone will agree with me. I also know this topic can be a trigger for some. So, this is the only warning I have for this story. Just know, it is realistically portrayed.

Religion is also at the forefront of the story. They are both immersed into their culture, being of Israeli background. Faith is an underlying current throughout their story. I felt that I learned quite a bit about being Jewish without it being shoved down my throat. You also see how both Adina and Tovah practice or not practice their faith in Judaism. Both sisters have different views on religion and how they want to live their life devoted or not so devoted to God. How they both relate to their Jewish Identity was just fascinating.

I am so surprised that I’LL MISS YOU WHEN I AM GONE is a debut novel. It just feels like Rachel Lynn Solomon has all these great books behind her and she knows how awesome she is as a writer. I mean she is a fantastic writer regardless, but for a debut novel to be this great, to pull you right into the story and make you fall in love with all of the characters and to take on such a heavy and emotional heart wrenching topic is nothing more than phenomenal. What an outstanding debut! I can not praise this story enough. I am really looking forward for more books/stories from this author. ( )
  RobynReo | Aug 15, 2018 |
“You can spend lifetimes searching tragedies for reasons why.”

This was such a great human story. Everything felt so real and earnest. We follow estranged twin sisters, Adina and Tovah, as their lives are changed after one of them tests positive for Huntington's Disease - the same disease that has caused their mom so much pain. Now each girl must reconcile their futures, their faith, and their relationships in the face of this new information.

I really liked that Adinah and Tocah were just so human. They got angry and had fights and messed up. They were not perfect people and I didn’t agree with everything they did, but I liked them because they were fallible. They had completely emotional responses to a life-changing situation and I really loved that. I liked that we got to see a practicing Jewish family, and we got to see what their faith meant to each girl. Faith is such a personal things, and I liked seeing how each girl chose to interact with it.

This was such an enjoyable emotional read, and I loved the realness of it. I’m a such for twin stories, so that’s what drew me in, but You’ll Miss Me When I’m Gone is a beautifully compelling story of forgiveness, family, and looking to your future - even when it’s irrecoverably changed.

Trigger warnings for self harm and suicide idealization.

I received a copy of the book from Simon Pulse via Edelweiss in exchange for an honest review. ( )
  LifeofaLiteraryNerd | Apr 27, 2018 |
This is an interesting young adult book where fraternal twins Adina and Tovah come to terms not only with their mother's declining health due to Huntington's Disease, an inherited and fatal condition, but with the potential that they could also develop the disease. When they turn 18, they both are tested, with different results. Their relationship had already been strained, but this diagnosis widens these rifts. This is an compelling look at family dynamics made worse with illness, both in the present and in the future. ( )
  Susan.Macura | Jan 29, 2018 |
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Eighteen-year-old twins Adina, a viola prodigy, and Tovah, a future surgeon, find their relationship tested when they learn that one of them will develop Huntington's, the degenerative disease ravaging their mother.

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