The Arbinger InstituteRecensioner

I read this as an ebook from the library. Very thought provoking and insightful! I am ordering a hard copy for myself to read again and to refer back to. Highly recommend.

This builds on the core ideas found in Leadership and Self-Deception and to The Anatomy of Peace. Uses a lot of short stories and case studies to illustrate the inward vs outward mindset. More of a conceptual than how-to book. You'll learn:
• The difference between inward and outward mindsets, and why/how they affect your relationships;
• The 3 steps to make a mind shift at a personal, team/organizational level; and
• Additional insights from various real-life case studies to understand how a single mindset shift can create lasting change.

Book summary at: https://readingraphics.com/book-summary-the-outward-mindset/

This is a book about resolving conflicts and finding peace in your relationships at home, your place of work or even in conflicts between nations. .
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I was a bit doubtful about picking up a book written by an institute and when I read what it promises to do it seemed even more sketchy but I picked it up anyways. I read a few pages and had to stop because of some academic engagement and got back to it recently.
This book is a bit different as it uses fictional characters to present its subject. The book talks about a rehabilitation camp for young people, called “Camp Moriah”(named after the famous Mt Moriah). It’s run by Yusuf-al-Salah and Avi Rozen, an unlikely duo of a Muslim from Jordan and a devout Jewish man from Israel whose fathers were killed in conflicts of their own community with the other’s. A bunch of parents and their children arrive at the camp and the parents are asked to stay for two days for an orientation. The message of the book is put forward during this period.
The book talks about how people can carry out their actions with either a heart at peace or a heart at war. The book teaches us to view others are people like us and not as objects in the face of conflict. It talks about how we can change our way of being and help our heart be at peace and be the catalyst for a change in a conflict or a person instead of invoking the behaviour or issue that we are trying to end in the first place. The book even used examples by giving us stories of each of these parents, especially Lou Herbert, an ex military man whose sun has a serious substance abuse problem.
We are taught using certain diagrams and these examples to help make things go right in a situation where a conflict arises rather than correcting someone or blaming them for causing us discomfort.
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Overall, I liked the book. It was a bit boring in between but it has a really good message. I have given it 3.5 stars on Goodreads. I would say it’s a really good read and definitely pick it up.

Según sus autores, las personas sometidas al autoengaño viven y trabajan como si se encontraran encerradas en una caja. Ciegas a la realidad circundante, van minando tanto su propio trabajo como el de los demás. Pero el problema es que, como están encerrados en la caja, no se dan cuenta de ello y, por tanto, no hacen nada por cambiar. Y así, sus resultados tampoco varían.

Tal como se expone en esta obra, se trata de un fenómeno bastante frecuente en el mundo empresarial. La mayor parte de gente pasa mucho tiempo ahí encerrada, y es la multiplicación de cajas la raíz de muchos de los problemas que impiden un mejor rendimiento laboral, afectando a aspectos como el liderazgo, el trabajo en equipo, la comunicación, la responsabilidad, la confianza, el compromiso y la motivación.

Pero no todo son malas noticias: existe una solución frente al autoengaño y las costosas consecuencias que se derivan de él. A través de una historia entretenida y muy instructiva, La Caja explica qué es el autoengaño, cómo cae en él la gente, de qué manera destruye el rendimiento organizativo y, lo más importante, cuál es la sorprendente manera de acabar con él.

good ideas condescending tone stupid metaphor made me giggle when they kept on talking about the box in the box out of the box

I find myself wondering all the time, "How can [that person] possibly see the world that way/reach that conclusion/think that? How are they not more self aware? Why am I getting so frustrated with this person who is clearly having a different experience than I am?" This books gives you the answer. I've learned this lesson in other formats, but this short book presents it in a very accessible way. Even though the business story approach is a little stilted, it's still a quick read. It provides a very simple but profound way to be aware of your internal state-of-mind and how you relate to other people in both professional and personal settings.

Read the other reviews and the blurbs. It's as amazing as everyone says, and I don't really have much to add.

I find myself wondering all the time, "How can [that person] possibly see the world that way/reach that conclusion/think that? How are they not more self aware? Why am I getting so frustrated with this person who is clearly having a different experience than I am?" This books gives you the answer. I've learned this lesson in other formats, but this short book presents it in a very accessible way. Even though the business story approach is a little stilted, it's still a quick read. It provides a very simple but profound way to be aware of your internal state-of-mind and how you relate to other people in both professional and personal settings.

Read the other reviews and the blurbs. It's as amazing as everyone says, and I don't really have much to add.

Loved it. A shorter version of "The Bonds that Make us Free. " I think I liked the former better but this is the perfect size for a recap. Also I'm not quite sure that it qualifies for non-fiction. They frame it as a story. But it's meant to be seen as non-fiction.

The material was good but the presentation wasn't my favorite. I have a hard time with fictionalized non-fiction.

If you could improve a relationship, a job, or any other interpersonal interaction simply by changing your own behavior, would you do it? The answer to this seems obvious, but the answer is at the core of this book - self-deception.

The bulk of this book is a fictional telling of a few days in a man's life who is a recently hired executive in a successful company. He is called in by his manager for a discussion, which is to be for two days. He is told that the discussion and training involved will be critical for his continued employment. Over these two days, his world view is changed - a more correct statement might be that his perceptions are changed. He is first presented with ideas. He considers them and then during a break tests them with varied results. He is prepared to reject the ideas but is then reinforced with supporting ideas by the CEO of the company, and his manager. He tests the ideas again, this time without really knowing that he is testing the ideas. He goes forth with a new mindset to his family, and treats them in way that shows that he sees them as people, rather than objects. The results are immediate, if not fully developed. He comes back the next day to discuss and discovers what happened, and what he can do to continue the behavior that produced positive results.

I enjoyed reading the story in this way (reading it as a fictional story), because it helped me to picture the direction of ones thoughts. The narrative progresses with ideas being presented, received, digested, and implemented. One of the strongest parts of the book is a section that goes over alternative approaches, and how each one of them fails. These alternatives are carefully considered and analyzed, so that it is clear why they will not work.

The idea of self-betrayal is key to understanding the whole book. We often think that others betray us in business, home, community, and that may be true, but what if we are the ones that are enabling, encouraging, directing this betrayal? Then it is indeed self-betrayal. The book illustrates how we form these kinds of self-betrayal relationships, and then illustrates how we can change from self-betrayal to outward awareness.

I know that this book is useful for multiple applications. I have already seen results in myself and those I interact with at work and at home. I highly recommend it for everyone.

An excellent book that discusses what the outward mindset is and how it can be applied in many different situations, including police forces, military operations, business operations from the top, to middle management, to front line workers, and also how it can be applied in the home.

The outward mindset focuses on seeing the needs, objectives, and challenges of four main groups (which can be altered based on particular circumstance): managers, customers, peers, and reports. In doing so, their needs are addressed, which in turn builds trust and mutual empathy.

The book explains that one of the biggest hurdles of practicing the outward mindset is the misunderstanding that it causes one to be a patsy or open to abuse. Practicing the outward mindset does not require that one turn into a punching bag or a scapegoat. It is really about personal accountability, and doing everything in ones power to open pathways to success by thinking of others and not focusing on selfish desires, which often are counter to the path of success. The many stories illustrated in the book show how practicing the outward mindset was successful, and also demonstrate how easy it is to fall back into inward mindset practices if ones actions are not reviewed and tweaked. (The authors share an example that they had themselves, being fully aware of the outward mindset, and nearly botching things with a critical client).

I recommend this book (as they do) to anyone who thinks "I can do better that I have been doing".

I intensely disliked this superficial book, although I can recognize that its basic premise does capture some element of some aspects of workplace dysfunction.½

This one is infuriatingly patronizing, and I felt like I was reading a very very long-form variant of the old Goofus and Gallant cartoons at times, but the main idea of the book seems sound. As with so many of these business books I'm reading, I feel like it would have made a great article but a whole book devoted to it tends to overwork the material.

Horrible. Tolerable advice but wrapped in an utterly inane and condescending story frame. For a book where the core message is not treating people like shit, the book is almost a self referential example toward a normal IQ adult reader.

This book is a story of a business executive. His business is falling apart, his son is on drugs, and his marriage is nothing to brag about. It reminds me of [b:The Goal: A Process of Ongoing Improvement|113934|The Goal A Process of Ongoing Improvement|Eliyahu M. Goldratt|https://d.gr-assets.com/books/1347617564s/113934.jpg|462428]. It is an engaging read and has a lesson that I would do well to apply.

An excellent book for business and outside of work as well. It has become popular to write some business books in a narrative style. Many times this feels artificial but this book makes it work. The questions that the protagonist asks are the same as I would be asking in that situation.

All that is well and good, but the information provided is really wonderful. Coming up with various strategies for both recognizing that change in needed and strategies for making those changes are provided.

So good that I bought the book. Well worth the read.

This book proposes to improve work, personal, and family relationships by treating others as people as opposed to objects and to examine self responsibility for conflict and problems. It is proposed that this change in mindset can improve productivity. I believe that the premise is correct while the concept is simplistic. I strongly recommend the book for management.½

An application of the dangers of self-deception message promoted by the Arbinger Institute, this time in terms of all sorts of relationships, from family members to among nation-states.

The information is set forth in yet another campy narrative; if you're following the story, it's all technically a flashback to the transformation of Lou Herbert who would go on to transform his company and lead to the context of Leadership and Self-Deception. Lou is learning about self-deception and blaming and its effects from Yusuf and Avi in the context of a boot camp to rehabilitate troubled youth.

If anything I felt the presentation in The Anatomy of Peace felt more compelling and relevant since it was taken out of the workplace context (as in Leadership and Self-Deception). There is much to be gained from the premise of getting "out of the box" to see people as such, and not objects, to be warm toward them and work with them for their benefit, not merely yours.

As with Leadership and Self-Deception, so with The Anatomy of Peace: you have to get past the campy story that seems to follow extremely similar tropes, while understanding that it has to be told as a story or most people wouldn't get far in it. I'm still bothered that a book that's trying to humanize relationships is not even claimed by a human but by a rather impersonal Institute.

It would seem to me that the Arbinger Institute's emphasis on self-deception and the value of escaping it reflects a more masculine / conservative / libertarian perspective on what is becoming popular in feminine / liberal perspectives as vulnerability. There is certainly something to be gained from each perspective.

An engaging presentation in narrative format regarding the difficulties which stem from self-deception and the need for personal justification, blame of others, and the problems these cause. An appeal to find the humanity in others and treat others accordingly.

I will not try to unpack the entire presentation of the book because the reader will have a lot of reasons to want to try to avoid the material. It's not the most comfortable process to explore, but very beneficial to do so.

The book is presented as a narrative involving a few characters and a corporation, and the reader is invited to go with "Tom" on his journey, and, ideally, engaging in the same kind of self-reflection as "Tom" does.

The narrative gets campy at times; the self-aggrandization of the book is a bit much; the lack of personality behind the authorship seems at odds with the core message. Nevertheless, a very necessary even if uncomfortable exploration of the self so that one might live more profitably for him or herself and interact better with others.

amazing book that helps you take a critical look at your own attitudes

I love this book because if you read it with an open heart, your heart will change. You come to see the truth behind your actions, thoughts and beliefs.

Time I will never recover. This came recommended. And that in itself is numbing. Trivialities; contrived, saccharine anecdotes; endless repetition. Okay, not endless...they mercifully did end the book...but not before battering the poor reader senseless with a single concept over and over and ...

If anyone finds anything enlightening about this...no, better I should be nice and just give it two stars...which I did.

I read this for a book study, as a part of my coursework for a Masters in Teaching. It's a book that I think that everyone should read, especially if you wish to reduce drama, conflict, and stress in your life. However, I do have a few criticisms. First of all, it's strange because it's a fictional narrative. I think that, for many, this would be a characteristic that would make it more engaging, and it does make the book much more accessible. For me, however, I thought that it was kind of hard to apply the universal theme to my own life because it was so attached to the characters in the story (as opposed to a nonfiction book with a similar purpose, like A New Earth). Which leads me to my second point, the fact that the main character, whom the book examines the deepest, is a man. A business man. This book was originally written for the business world and similar leaders, so it makes sense. But as a female, I'm always waiting for the book to explore the main character's wife more, for example, because I identified a lot more with her struggles (Want-to-Be-Seen-As boxes and passive aggressiveness). Of course I still gleaned a lot of great information from this book (After all, I do still have Better-Than and I-Deserve boxes as well, just not as many.), but I question the books applicability in the teaching world, a profession predominately composed of women. Despite my criticisms, I enjoyed this book very much and would recommend it to pretty much anyone. Too bad I purchased it on the Kindle and can't pass it around.

Some books do not seem overly compelling while you are reading them but then you find they resonate long after you've finished them. This is such a book. It's an easy read that at times feels a little to pat. However I continually find my self thinking about the concepts. The basic concept being to think of others as people and just vehicles to fill your needs. I strongly recommend taking a little time to read.

Anatomy of Peace delivers the goods. This is the Arbinger Institute's second book; Leadership and Self-Deception is their first. It's been so long since I've read the latter, that I really can't compare it to AoP. As far as didactic fiction goes, AoP is the best I've read. The fictional device really isn't that annoying. The story concerns the leaders of Mount Moriah, a troubled-teen camp, Yusef and Avi (Arab and Jew, respectively). The camp's name refers to the site of the "Dome of the Rock" in Israel. Yusef and Avi meet with the troubled-teens' parents, and their conversation forms the bulk of the novel.

The book shows how anyone in a conflict actually causes and perpetuates the conflict by colluding, usually unknowingly, with their 'enemy.' This dynamic informs not only domestic conflicts but national and international conflicts as well. When I view someone as an enemy, I'm viewing her as an object. Alternatively, when I view her as a person, I can't treat her as an enemy.

At any rate, excellent information, well worth the time to read.